The first few weeks of a new school year give providers an opportunity to learn about the children in their classroom. By late September, providers may begin to notice friendship patterns, children who are having trouble connecting, children who are quiet or hesitant, and routines that may not be working well for everyone. These observations can help providers think about an important question: Does every child feel like they belong?
Belonging means that children feel accepted, valued, respected, and included. When children feel that they are an important part of their classroom community, they are more likely to feel comfortable participating, building relationships, and learning. Providers do not have to create a perfect classroom. Small, intentional changes can help every child feel more connected.
Children spend a large part of their day in early learning and school settings. The relationships and experiences they have in these settings can shape how comfortable they feel participating and connecting with others. A strong sense of belonging can help:
By this point in the school year, providers may have a better understanding of how children interact with one another. Take time to observe children during free play, group activities, transitions, meals, and outdoor play. Look for children who may:
Remember that every child is different. Some children enjoy playing independently and may not need help connecting with others. The goal is not to make every child interact in the same way. Instead, providers can look for children who want to participate or connect but may need additional support.
Friendships do not always happen naturally. Some children may need help finding a way to join a group or start an interaction. Providers can create opportunities for children to connect by:
For example, instead of telling a child, "Go find someone to play with," a provider could say, "You both like animals. Would you like to build a zoo together?" A simple starting point can make joining a group easier.
Create Inclusive Classroom Routines
A routine that works well for most children may still be difficult for some. Long waits, unclear directions, loud spaces, or sudden changes can make participation harder. Providers can make routines more accessible by:
The goal is not to create a completely different routine for every child. Instead, providers can make small changes that remove barriers and help more children participate successfully.
Every child and family should feel welcomed, valued, and included. Take a moment to look around your classroom. Does it reflect the children and families you serve? Children should have opportunities to see their families, cultures, languages, abilities, and experiences represented in meaningful ways. Ways to promote belonging include:
Representation should not be limited to a special event or one month of the year. It can be part of the classroom throughout the year.
Give Children a Voice
Children should have opportunities to share their ideas and experiences. Asking children simple questions can help providers understand what makes them feel comfortable and included. Try asking:
Younger children may not always have the words to explain how they feel. Providers can also learn by watching children's behavior and listening to the ways they communicate.
Some children may need additional support to feel connected to their classroom community. This does not mean something is wrong with the child. A provider might:
The goal is to support children without making them feel different or singled out.
Families know their children best. They can provide information that providers may not see during the school day. Ask families questions such as:
Regular communication helps providers better understand each child and gives families a chance to share what works for them.
Neurodivergent children may learn, communicate, play, move, or interact with others in different ways. An inclusive classroom recognizes these differences as part of human diversity. Providers can support neurodivergent children by:
The goal is belonging, not sameness. Children should not have to change who they are just to feel included.
Research shows that children's sense of belonging is connected to relationships, safety, friendship, and feeling included. Children who feel accepted by their peers may also be more engaged in classroom activities. Research also highlights the importance of creating early learning environments where children see themselves represented and feel respected. Inclusive environments can support children's relationships and sense of belonging.
Studies also suggest that children's own voices are important when understanding belonging. Listening to children can help providers learn what makes them feel accepted and connected. For children with disabilities and neurodivergent children, meaningful participation and supportive relationships can help children become active members of their classroom communities.
Belonging does not happen by accident. It develops through everyday interactions, relationships, classroom routines, and opportunities for children to participate.
Providers can help children feel that they belong by noticing who may need additional support, creating opportunities for friendships, listening to children's voices, partnering with families, and making classroom routines accessible to everyone. The goal is not for every child to participate in exactly the same way. The goal is for every child to know that they have a place in the classroom community.
Frequently Asked Questions
What if a child prefers to play alone?
Playing alone is not always a concern. Some children enjoy independent play. Watch for signs that the child wants to connect but may need help doing so.
How can I help a child who has trouble making friends?
Start small. Connect the child with one peer who shares an interest and provide an activity they can do together.
Do all children need to participate in the same way?
No. Children may need different support or different ways to participate. Inclusion means providing meaningful opportunities for every child.
How can I tell if a child feels like they belong?
Look for signs such as participating in activities, connecting with trusted adults or peers, sharing ideas, and appearing comfortable in the classroom. When possible, ask children directly about their experiences.
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Erwin, E. J., Valentine, M., & Toumazou, M. (2024). The study of belonging in early childhood education: Complexities and possibilities. International Journal of Early Years Education, 32(1), 6–20. https://doi.org/10.1080/09669760.2022.2128307
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