I talk about play a lot as a doctor. It comes up during regular physicals, talks about learning or milestone delays, visits for behavior concerns, and plans for dealing with transitions or trauma. Play is something many people take for granted. But the research is clear that play is crucial for children to reach their fullest health and development.
For infants and toddlers, most of their early playtime is with parents and caregivers. This parent-child play is especially important. *You may hear this talked about as “serve and return” which means a back-and-forth interaction between a baby and their caregiver. For example, your baby blows a raspberry, and you smile and blow a raspberry back.* These playful moments strengthen your relationship, build baby’s core skills, and reduce the impacts of stress. They can even affect a baby’s genes in a positive way for the rest of their life.
For some families, finding playful moments can be difficult or intimidating. If caregivers are busy, overwhelmed, or stressed, play can move to the back burner. Some parents may not feel confident playing with their babies, especially if they didn’t experience parent-child play in their childhood or if they suffer from postpartum depression or anxiety. Some children may have behavioral, developmental, or physical challenges that affect how they play.
The good news is that playful moments look different for every family. They can be brief (even just a few seconds), can be fit into daily chores (like peek-a-boo with clean laundry or tickling toes during a bath), and can be personalized for your family’s interests (e.g. cooking, music, art, or gardening). There’s no “right” way to play. What matters is that you and your child are enjoying each other in a safe and positive way. And it’s okay to “fake it ‘til you make it.” A few seconds of play may actually put you in a more playful mood.
Here are just a few ways that early play leads to healthy kids and some ideas for starting a habit of playful parenting:
Play is good for physical health.
Play is how children build fine and gross motor skills in their first years of life. Active play improves heart and lung health. And studies show outdoor play improves children’s sleep duration and quality while lowering their stress hormones.
Play is good for brain development
Play builds neural pathways in children’s brains. It teaches kids cause and effect, problem-solving, and creativity. Children’s brains are designed to learn through play. It’s more effective than flashcards, computer games, educational shows, or workbooks.
Play is good for mental health
Back and forth play with a parent is a building block of emotional regulation. Play builds children’s confidence and resilience. Playful interactions with supportive caregivers protect kids from stress.
Play improves social skills
Early parent-child play strengthens children’s earliest relationships. Children’s positive, supportive relationships with their parents has a huge impact on long-term outcomes. Play also teaches skills like empathy, sharing, taking turns, and cooperation.